I Miss You Everyday, Remember?
Thursday, July 10, 2008 @ 7:37 PM
mood: 
sad
listening to: Desperately by Michelle Branch
I saw the person I've been missing so much today. (At first I looked at him like I'm in a trance or somethin' then I asked May and Len, "Hey, is he who I think he is?" ROFL Yeah I'm a dork.. a myopic dork..) He looks fine and happy. It's quite sad that my predictions became true. (Most of my predictions come true, I swear.) In high school, we're so close. Now it's like "see ya when I see ya". *sigh* Well, that's one of the big sacrifices I made in the past.
It somehow makes me ponder about my decisions back then [again]. He asked more than 3 times.. I declined all those times. I didn't trust him enough. I didn't trust him because I wanted him to make sure that he's really over her. I'm not the type of girl who'd want to be for rebound. [Hell no.] But somehow.. Somehow.. I suppose I do regret a lot of things in the past. I was too defensive. I was too.. innocent. I was a neophyte when it comes to relationships. My defense mechanisms and fears held my decisions. I'm not saying it's a bad thing, I mean, they're called defense mechanisms for a reason, you know?
But still..
Maybe I should've been more stubborn.
Perhaps these random thoughts occur for the mere fact that I miss him so terribly. I miss the things we do, the things we talk about, all those of what we share.. memories.. experiences.. *sigh* Mag-senti ka ba, Mia?
It was noon today that sis Chamie gave me a missed call on my mobile. I was getting ready for school. I thought she needs to talk to me or something. I called her. She simply said, "Wala lang. Naisip lang kita." She told me she's been looking at our memorabiliasss. I teased her, "Aba mag-senti ba?"
Yeah. Mas madalas ako mag-senti, Chamie. There's never a time that I stop thinking. Sometimes I wish to just stop. But then again, we know what that means. LOL I'm not ready to give in to insanity or death yet, thank you very much.
It's been like almost 4 years that we became friends. Hope it will last a lifetime. Yeah, friends. It would be great to have your first love as your friend for the rest of your life.
What am I saying, we are friends! Yeah. Friends. But not close friends anymore. Sad, isn't? Why did it became like this? *sigh* Like I'll always say, "Hayaan na lang. It was our decision naman din eh."
But still..
I do miss him terribly.
Perhaps there is.
Perhaps there isn't.
Perhaps it should've been.
Perhaps...
Perhaps...
For now, it's "perhaps".
We'll never know.
Note: Malakas ang loob ni Mia mag-post ng ganito kasi alam nyang hindi naman to nababasa. LOLI want to stop wondering "what-ifs".
I need to know "what is".
sadlistening to: Desperately by Michelle Branch
I saw the person I've been missing so much today. (At first I looked at him like I'm in a trance or somethin' then I asked May and Len, "Hey, is he who I think he is?" ROFL Yeah I'm a dork.. a myopic dork..) He looks fine and happy. It's quite sad that my predictions became true. (Most of my predictions come true, I swear.) In high school, we're so close. Now it's like "see ya when I see ya". *sigh* Well, that's one of the big sacrifices I made in the past.
It somehow makes me ponder about my decisions back then [again]. He asked more than 3 times.. I declined all those times. I didn't trust him enough. I didn't trust him because I wanted him to make sure that he's really over her. I'm not the type of girl who'd want to be for rebound. [Hell no.] But somehow.. Somehow.. I suppose I do regret a lot of things in the past. I was too defensive. I was too.. innocent. I was a neophyte when it comes to relationships. My defense mechanisms and fears held my decisions. I'm not saying it's a bad thing, I mean, they're called defense mechanisms for a reason, you know?
But still..
Maybe I should've been more stubborn.
Something 'bout the way you looked at me
Made me think for a moment
That maybe we were meant to be
Living our lives seperately
And it's strange that things change
But not me wanting you
So desperately
Perhaps these random thoughts occur for the mere fact that I miss him so terribly. I miss the things we do, the things we talk about, all those of what we share.. memories.. experiences.. *sigh* Mag-senti ka ba, Mia?
It was noon today that sis Chamie gave me a missed call on my mobile. I was getting ready for school. I thought she needs to talk to me or something. I called her. She simply said, "Wala lang. Naisip lang kita." She told me she's been looking at our memorabiliasss. I teased her, "Aba mag-senti ba?"
Yeah. Mas madalas ako mag-senti, Chamie. There's never a time that I stop thinking. Sometimes I wish to just stop. But then again, we know what that means. LOL I'm not ready to give in to insanity or death yet, thank you very much.
It's been like almost 4 years that we became friends. Hope it will last a lifetime. Yeah, friends. It would be great to have your first love as your friend for the rest of your life.
What am I saying, we are friends! Yeah. Friends. But not close friends anymore. Sad, isn't? Why did it became like this? *sigh* Like I'll always say, "Hayaan na lang. It was our decision naman din eh."
But still..
I do miss him terribly.
Perhaps there is.
Perhaps there isn't.
Perhaps it should've been.
Perhaps...
Perhaps...
For now, it's "perhaps".
We'll never know.
Note: Malakas ang loob ni Mia mag-post ng ganito kasi alam nyang hindi naman to nababasa. LOL
Labels: friendship, melancholy, school, song lyrics
I need to know "what is".
